So, how is it going?

It's been one month since I finally made it to Canada 🎉 (after a few bumps on the road...)

I think I haven't written about this, but in the end, I made it here on the third try. After I wrote a 0 for an O on the US visa application, I got a flight re-scheduled for 3 weeks later. On that day, I went to the airport with lots of time in advance and we were waiting, and waiting, and waiting. Until the airline crew let us know the flight was not departing so we would all be re-scheduled on other flights. (Another strike of amazing luck, yay... 🥲) But despite the chaos, I cherish the memories of that morning because my mom was with me and the people around us were super lovely, and we quickly made friends with them 💛

So the next day, I finally made it out of Valencia to Amsterdam for a few hours layover.

And then smoothly (except that I lost a jacket at the airport 🤦‍♀️) I arrived in Canada. I was suuuuper nervous about the border process to activate the visa. But in the end, it was super easy.

As it would be expected, I started to get asked a lot "So, how is it going?".

And every time, I got a little more anxious.

I really didn't know what to answer.

I wasn't sure if I had a long-term house. I didn't have a job. I wasn't even getting any interviews. It was aaaalways raining... What was I supposed to say?

It already started quite rough with all the airport issues. It almost felt as if Canada didn't want me here. As if maybe this wasn't the right path for me at this moment of my life after all. And it didn't seem to be getting any better since I was already here.

I usually try to pay attention to the synchronicities of life that point us to the right path and I do think we should trust more our gut. But, I guess, sometimes you just have to say "Dear Universe, go fuck yourself" and keep moving forwards.

So I did.

And after lots of jet lag, leaving the house I thought would be in for long-term, moving into a new house, setting up a NEIDEN IKEA bed by myself, giving out more than 20 resumes in person, sending out more than 100 online applications, feeling lonely, but also seeing old friends that I love and making some new ones...

I guess I'm now ready to answer the question.

So, how is it going?

As some relationships on Facebook: it's complicated.

I'm broke, I feel lonely most of the time and I've just been struggling more than I thought I would.

But also, ✨ I love my new house and new flatmates. I love the area we live in and I am so deeply happy every time I walk around and see these colorful beautiful wooden houses, and the mountains, and the crows, and the Downtown skyline, and every time I see the shiny head of a seal swimming in the water. ✨

And I'm happy I'm pushing myself to go through uncomfortable moments that will help me build the life I want. Like going to the flow jams on Wednesdays despite my insecurities, or giving out resumés in places that inspire me despite not having a sign out for hiring, or signing up for a Portrait Photography course even though I could have used that money to get a nightstand and some shelving instead of using my suitcase as a drawer.

And despite feeling lonely sometimes, I truly know I'm not alone 💛 (in both the virtual and physical spaces 💛)

And finally last week, 🎉 I got a job 🎉 in a bike rental shop (if you know me, you'll see the irony in this 😅). So I feel a bit lighter now. It's super chill and fun. The only downside is that most of the time I'm the only non-Persian speaker and it can get a bit annoying not understanding what's going on around you. But focusing on the positives, they are all really lovely and I enjoy spending the day chatting with tourists.

I still don't feel exactly fulfilled, but it works for now!

I just need to remind myself to be patient and keep focusing energy on the things I would like to keep growing on 💛 (like the upcoming photography course for which I'm super excited!).

A note to wrap up: apparently today on May 16th, Jupiter is moving to Taurus for a year and that apparently means that it should be a pretty epic year for self-growth and identity 🤷‍♀️ I feel like I already sort of started walking on that path during the last couple of months, so I'm gonna use this post to realign my intentions and remind myself to stay focused on my growth with patience. And we'll see how life will be going one year from now 😃

So bring it on Jupiter! 💪